The Darkest Hour
Morphine WithdrawalsThe decision of living without this desire
Addiction of the worst just to survive
Just to be normal and live everyday
To destroy the stress and the tension in the most simple way
Life was so easy and nothing came close
If you felt it was slipping you just up the dose
But everything that goes up must one day fall hard
Feelings take your mind that you once did disregard
You have to make a choice to live as you’re meant
To take back your mind and body at all costs
But to do this you know the suffering must be spent
For days and your sanity will temporary be lost
Then the pain starts to take you
Your mind goes to mush
Your insides are screaming
For the love of a push
To be out of your misery, just to fall from this life
No more bloody agony, no more screaming inside
To kill all the frustration and numb all the strife
But to be back to normal this pain you abide
So first you start breathing at an unhealthy rate
Your eyes don’t stop steaming and skins is on fire
You think it
What it's Like
No Way OutThose who do not know me well
Know not what I must endure.
Methinks, therefore, that they should keep
Their opinions to themselves;
For I find it truly exasperating
To hear the thoughtless things they say.
Their misinformed, judgemental words
Ever shock me, shake me, stress me.
I optimistically try to tell myself
That these people "mean well" -
But it's far easier for me to say the words
Than it is to believe them.
You see, some folk like to posit
That I have a choice -
I should not take my medications;
I should use herbs, or prayer instead.
Or worse, they imply (rather rudely)
That it's my fault I'm ill;
Through some vile sin,
Or lack of faith or 'wanting' to be healed.
It is offensive to my soul, and to my ears as well,
To hear such things!
I try not to listen, not to care -
Alas, largely without success.
The cool sting of such inhumane words
Invades my memory;
And like a torturous biting loop,
It replays in my mind.
These people know not how it feels
To dislocate joints, as I do;
Walk with me.Who wants to walk with me down this long road?
Who wants to make this journey that's so very cold?
Where hearts are dark with no room for love
Blackened their soul, twisted the raven to look like a dove.
Inner demons flooding my dreams
making the most normal thing not as it seems
Wildly dark demons penetrating my mind
searching for secrets, never for me to find.
The deepest trust given to ones I care for
turn to deceit and lies, friends no more.
The cruelest ways and words left me in sorrow
ripped out my heart like there's no tomorrow.
Feeling foolish and feeling so hurt...
as my heart no more important than a piece of dirt,
As I said, "Who wants this walk down this road with me?
Feel this pain, despair and my sorrow see?"
Three people personDEPRESSED DEBBIE: Not to sound depressed or anything, but I don't see the point in socializing like this. Or at all.
NEUTRAL NELLY: I just thought we'd meet and try to work out our differences while having dinner together. We're family after all, and proper meals and exercise is what keeps one in balance.
DEPRESSED DEBBIE: Wow, you're a living cliché!
NEUTRAL NELLY: You're a never ending teenage riot.
DEPRESSED DEBBIE: Adults loose touch with their believes, like you.
NEUTRAL NELLY: You really see me as an adult?
DEPRESSED DEBBIE: Yeah... What, you don't?
NEUTRAL NELLY: Sometimes. Mostly not.
DEPRESSED DEBBIE: That's weird.
NEUTRAL NELLY: I guess. Anyway, you need some food. You're a lot thinner than I remember.
DEPRESSED DEBBIE: Eating is kind of a way to tell life that you're on it's side. I'm not sure I'm okay with that. Might accept some vitamin b-tablets though... Kidding.
NEUTRAL NELLY: You should watch it. 50, 20 something percent of bipolar people turn into alcoholics.